Random Fun Things

So, first of all, I have decided it is bad to write about PMS when you are having PMS. Case in point, my last blog.

Anyway, this week was interesting and fun. I am a member of our Nutrition Interest Group and we were asked to be a part of a healthy food fair at Rose Park Elementary. This elementary school is on the west side, and is probably one of the most diverse schools around. So, we set up our booth along with about 9 other groups from around the valley. The school had a guest speaker: former Olympian Derek Para. Derek Para was the first Mexican (American, though) to win medals in speed skating. He won both a gold and a silver in 2002. He was really inspiring as he talked about how he got into speed skating and how nutrition was so important for him. I got to hold his Olympic medals! They were really heavy! As for the food fair, we made veggie quesadillas that were really easy and the kids really loved them. If any of you are interested in the recipe, let me know and I will post it.

Next topic...egg donation. So, we had a session this week about infertility. Women are paid $5000 to donate eggs. In fact, the doctor told us that med students can get upwards of $10,000 because med students are expected to have high intelligence (we have fooled a lot of people :-) ). For a split second, I almost considered being an egg donor, but there are two drawbacks: #1: there would be little Maggie's running around (poor parents...they didn't know what they were getting into) and #2: What if I don't have enough eggs when we are finally ready for kids? We women only have a limited number of eggs, so I think I better just hoard mine until the time comes.

Well, that was my week in a nutshell! And, as usual, I have another test this coming week!

Wanted: Women Doctors

My posts for the next week will be mostly about reproduction and women's issues since that is the unit we are in right now.

I think one reason we NEED women as doctors is because they care about women's issues! The following is a quote from a text book that is not too old regarding PMS:

Most women suffering from PMS are somehow "causing it" and successful treatment depends on a "responsive and cooperative patient who wants to get better."

Fortunately, the woman who gave the lecture said that this idea is being debunked, but doctors still don't know what the cause is behind PMS. I'll tell you why I think they don't know, yet: it is because an industry that was filled with almost all men was convinced that women were just psychos and no other research needed to be put it into it.

In conjunction with the weird ideas behind women's health, I feel the need to include a little a little history lesson. You have all heard the word "hysteria." Well, this word got its meaning from women who were "crazy," and this craziness was being attributed to their uterus. One of the cures for this craziness was supposedly giving them a hysterectomy...oh, whoops, she's still "crazy"!

I know, I need to give male doctors some slack. After all, heart disease and cholesterol had to be researched because they were killing people; however, in the end, research is always about money. We have pills for impotence and surgeries to change any part of our bodies that we don't particularly like, and I can see finding a cure to PMS being a big money maker, too!

The good news is, with medical students around the nation being 50% women, you can be sure that there will be some sort of etiology found for these issues rather than attributing it to a 2-day freak out session "just because women choose to be that way."

So today, I am grateful that women are in medical school...not just because I am a woman in medical school, but also because now some of these "mysteries" can hopefully be solved and the world will, literally, be a happier place.

Keep your pants on!

I bet some of you may have wondered how we learn how to do pelvic exams. Well, even if you weren't, here is the DL (is this term even used anymore? I think I am way out of the loop on cool phrases.) Anyway, after a particularly grueling test on Endocrinology on Wednesday, I had to come back to the school later that day to learn pelvic exams. A program was created about 30 years ago by female medical students who realized that med students don't get a good learning experience for these very important exams (as in, the only people they had practiced on in the past were either dead or unconscious). As a result, if women had a bad experience, they were less apt to come back for regular check-ups. So, this program hires women, gives them an intensive training on the exam and then these women teach us how to do the exam on themselves. I know...the last part of that sentence probably grossed you out because all of us are a little squeamish about anyone seeing our private parts (rightfully so), but this was the most amazing experience. They told us when anything we did could possibly make someone uncomfortable (Example: I said, "Spread your legs"...probably not the best way to ask a woman to relax her legs out to the side) , they told us how to position our hands properly, etc. Yes, I am sure you are still grossed out, but none of us likes to have pelvic exams, and one that leaves no particularly bad memories is wonderful. So, today I am grateful for women who are willing to expose themselves for the common good, and you women out there should be, too!

E-mails that make us paranoid

A friend from school sent me this e-mail. It made me laugh, and I thought maybe some of you would also get a kick out of it. It's long, but I think it is pretty funny.

I just want to thank all of you for your educational emails over the past year.

Thanks to you, I no longer open a public bathroom door without using a paper towel.

I can't use the remote in a hotel room because I don't know what the last person was doing while flipping through the adult movie channels.

I can't sit down on the hotel bedspread because I can only imagine what has happened on it since it was last washed.
I can't enjoy lemon slices in my tea or on my seafood anymore because lemon peels have been found to contain all kinds of nasty germs including feces.

I have trouble shaking hands with someone who has been driving because the number one pass-time while driving alone is picking your nose (although cell phone usage may be taking the number one spot)

Eating a Little Debbie sends me on a guilt trip because I can only imagine how many gallons of trans fats I have consumed over the years.

I can't touch any woman's purse for fear she has placed it on the floor of a public bathroom. Yuck!

I must send my special thanks to whoever sent me the one about poop in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet sponge with every envelope that needs sealing.

Also, now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl (Penny Brown) who is about to die in the hospital for the 1,387,258th time. I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program.

I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me, and St. Theresa's novena has granted my every wish.

I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.

I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

Thanks to you, I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an email to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.

I no longer can buy gasoline without taking someone along to watch the car so a serial killer won't crawl in my back seat when I'm pumping gas..

I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr Pepper since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put 'Under God' on their cans.

I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.

And thanks for letting me know I can't boil a cup of water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face...disfiguring me for life.

I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.

I no longer receive packages from UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.

I no longer shop at Target since they are French and don't support our American troops or the Salvation Army.

I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica , Uganda & Singapore and Uzbekistan .

I no longer buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe.

Thanks to you, I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big brown African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when it bites my butt.

And thanks to your great advice, I can't ever pick up $5.00 dropped in the parking lot because it probably was placed there by a sex molester waiting underneath my car to grab my leg.

I can no longer drive my car because I can't buy gas from certain gas companies!

If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 70 minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 PM this afternoon and the fleas from 12 camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's beautician...

Have a wonderful day...

Oh, by the way.....
A German scientist from Argentina, after a lengthy study, has discovered that people with insufficient brain activity read their e-mail with their hand on the mouse.

Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late.

Peeping...Maggie!

This post is in no way related to school, but I just had to tell this story. A few years ago, when I was at Boise State, a photographer took some pictures of me working out to put on an advertisement for the rec center. Well, my brother Jarom called me today to tell me that while using a urinal today, he looked up, and there I was just staring at him. A little creepy...your sister staring at you while you're peeing! So, for all of you Boise State students...be careful when you pee, because I may be watching! :-)